Why Maths Anxiety is Hard to Escape
Mathematics anxiety is a psychological and physiological response to perceived threat, and once it takes hold, it behaves very much like a trap. The harder children struggle within it, the tighter it can become. Understanding this trap is the first step in helping children escape it with support, patience, and compassion.
How the trap is set
Most children do not fall into maths anxiety because of one dramatic event. Instead, the trap is usually set gradually.
Early experiences matter. A child may be embarrassed when asked to answer a question publicly, rushed through timed tests, compared unfavourably with peers, or exposed to subtle messages like “some people are just not maths people.” These moments, especially when repeated, teach the brain an important lesson: maths is not safe.
Because these experiences often happen in school, an environment children are taught to trust, the anxiety feels legitimate. Children rarely question whether the system is flawed; instead, they assume the problem lies within themselves. The trap closes quietly.
Crucially, the bait is often presented as motivation: speed, grades, competition, and praise for getting answers quickly rather than thinking deeply. For some children, this works. For others, it activates fear.
The self-reinforcing cycle
Once anxiety is present, it begins to shape behaviour; anxious children escape or avoid maths whenever possible.
Typical escape behaviours during maths tasks include taking frequent breaks as soon as discomfort rises, switching tasks when stuck, abandoning problems early, or using calculators prematurely to avoid mental effort. Although these strategies reduce anxiety mid-task, they cut off exposure so that the brain learns “leaving stops the threat,” not “I can tolerate this.”
Typical avoidance strategies include putting off maths homework or revision until the last moment, studying other subjects instead, skipping classes or tutorials, choosing courses or career paths to avoid maths, avoiding asking questions in class. These strategies involve not engaging with maths or delaying engagement so that the brain never experiences calm, repeated exposure to maths and the threat prediction is never updated.
Avoiding and escaping strategies may bring short-term relief but they also mean fewer opportunities to practise, build understanding, or experience success. Over time, skills weaken, not because the child lacks intelligence, but because learning has been disrupted. When the child next encounters maths, the anxiety is stronger, the work feels harder, and the cycle repeats.
This is the heart of the trap: anxiety leads to escape and avoidance, this in turn leads to gaps, and gaps deepen anxiety.
Why safety behaviours backfire
There may still be an escalation and ongoing problem even without obvious avoidance or escape. This is usually because of subtle forms of avoidance or what are called ‘safety behaviours’. Safety behaviours allow engagement only under perceived protection, which blocks corrective learning. They are a response to threat and reduce fear while preventing the brain from learning that it is overestimating the threat. Safety behaviours can be classified into three groups:
Over-reliance on external supports
Typical examples of this type of safety behaviour are constantly checking answers, using solution manuals immediately, watching worked examples on YouTube or AI solutions without attempting problems first. Relying on friends or tutors to “rescue” them also belongs to this category. In all these cases, the brain learns that it survived because of the safety behaviour, not because maths is safe. For example, constantly checking answers with a calculator may lead one to think “It is a good job I used my calculator, otherwise I would have made a calculation mistake.”
Perfectionism and over-preparation
This type of safety behaviour involves high effort to avoid uncertainty, which reinforces the belief that uncertainty = danger. Typical examples are rewriting notes excessively, studying far more than necessary to feel “safe”, and refusing to attempt problems unless fully confident.
Reassurance seeking
Needing repeated validation before moving on, asking teachers to confirm understanding even when correct, and frequently asking “Is this right?” reduces fear in the moment but this anxiety relief comes from reassurance, not learning so the threat remains intact.
Why anxiety blocks thinking
From an academic perspective, maths anxiety is closely linked to cognitive load. Mathematics relies heavily on working memory, the mental space we use to hold and manipulate information. Anxiety consumes that same space.
When a child feels threatened, their brain prioritises survival over reasoning. Stress hormones rise, attention narrows, and working memory capacity shrinks. Even children who understand the material may suddenly be unable to access it.
This leads to one of the most painful experiences for anxious learners: “I knew this yesterday, so why can’t I do it now?” Without understanding the role of anxiety, children often interpret this as proof they are “stupid,” further tightening the trap.
The myth of willpower
Well-meaning adults often suggest solutions like “try harder,” “practise more,” or “be confident.” While practice is important, these messages assume rational control. Maths anxiety is a learned response with real physiological effects. Willpower alone cannot override a threat response. Asking an anxious child to simply push through is like asking someone stuck in quicksand to struggle harder, the effort can actually make things worse.
When children internalise the idea that escape depends solely on effort, failure becomes personal. Shame replaces curiosity, and the trap gains barbed wire.
Identity and shame
Over time, maths anxiety often becomes part of a child’s identity. Statements like “I’m not a maths person” protect the child from repeated disappointment, but they also limit possibility. If you believe something is fundamentally not for you, why risk trying?
Shame plays a powerful role here. Many children hide their anxiety to avoid judgement. Parents may only see the surface behaviours — tears, anger, refusal — without realising how much fear lies underneath.
By adolescence, the trap can feel permanent. Adults with maths anxiety often trace it back to childhood, not because they lacked ability, but because they lacked safety.
Why support matters
Traps are difficult to escape from the inside. Maths anxiety is no different.
Research consistently shows that supportive environments reduce anxiety and improve learning. Support does not mean removing challenge; it means changing the conditions under which challenge occurs.
As parents, one of the most powerful things you can offer is belief, not blind optimism, but informed confidence that anxiety is something your child experiences, not something they are.
The trap works by convincing children they are the problem. Escape begins when we recognise the trap itself and stop expecting children to escape it alone.
